Monthly Archives: June 2016

Midnight Screaming: Stagefright: Aquarius

owl-head-deadly-moviesYears of experience with Lucio Fulci and Dario Argento, the reigning post-Bava Italian giallo masters, will give you Stagefright. For Michele Soavi, actor and assistant director to the masters turned first-time director here, this meant conjuring up this 1987 pseudo-slasher as his big come-up. The original title, Deliria, being vastly more apposite, this is less a slasher dressed up in giallo airs than a giallo putting on slasher clothing to sneak into the mainstream so it can uncloak its true self when the moment beckons. Like any good disreputable giallo, Stagefright is a bodacious concoction of performance-art murders choreographed like installation pieces, on one hand, and pure, unbridled instinct and impulse on the other. So while the kills may be judiciously filmed and planned, Soavi never lets anything as trivial as common sense or good taste trounce on his funhouse; his film is orchestrated but never programmatic. Continue reading

Un-Cannes-y Valley: Underground

003-underground-theredlistLike a flash of incandescent light that’ll burn your eyebrows off while staring into your soul, Emir Kusturica’s Underground is the film Roberto Benigni’s Life is Beautiful wishes it was. Even more indebted to a theoretically cloying magical realism than Life and yet so disturbed and delectably flaring in its madcap intersection of styles, Underground is a paean to not only human life but cinematic life excavated in the death throes of crisis. Imagine if you will Vittorio De Sica directing Abbott and Costello with a script written by Billy Wilder with Benny Hill on trombone just in case, all of whom were alternately inebriated and cocaine-addled during the production, and the beguiling war-time-as-apocalypse-rave-as-long-cavern-of-the-soul milieu of Underground is at least intimated in your ear. Continue reading

Review(s): Extraordinary Tales and Over the Garden Wall

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Raul Garcia’s clearly-heartfelt Extraordinary Tales nearly sabotages itself with an aggrandizing title that serves only to herald a hostile visual takeover of writer Edgar Allen Poe that the film’s mild-mannered recitations can’t quite live up to. With five of Poe’s tales retold and buttressed by five animation styles, Garcia’s film defers the immediate comparisons to Roger Corman’s seminal adaptations of many of the same Poe stories, even though Corman – in his bargain-bin wisdom – was able to transform those tales, reorienting their texture and form, in a way this film, competent though it may be, ultimately cannot.

Unfortunately, or fortunately depending on your proclivities, Extraordinary Tales has the misfortune (or fortune) of beginning on its weakest entry, an economical retelling of “The Fall of the House of Usher” that isn’t a patch on either of the seminal, and seminally avant-garde, 1928 adaptations that fractured the story and rebuilt it on distinctly cinematic lines, prefiguring discombobulated editing and fractured screen composition as the visual lexicon for redrawing Poe’s verbiage. In comparison, Extraordinary Tales merely condenses the tale, never reconfiguring or commenting on it, although the narration by Christopher Lee in his final role adds an undeniably sonorous cadence to Poe’s words. Continue reading

Progenitors: Video Game Adaptations

36abcc6df20b12f080adf2652ae21a0aa1c27757a365decc65622b7a8fe8df92Warcraft is out in theaters this Friday generally doing nothing to save the video game adaptation from the cinematic crypt. In eulogy, here are reviews of four that have come and gone before.

Mortal Kombat

Past its twenty-year expiration deadline, 1995’s once-comatose Mortal Kombat – none other than schlock-impresario Paul W.S. Anderson’s debut criminal offense – feels oddly whimsical and innocent today. With the likes of Warcraft desperately down on one knee praying for post-Lord of the Rings grandiosity, Mortal Kombat is a refreshingly slippery, stoopid animal infused with none of that straining, sprained-ankle seriousness. No, this is arguably the proper burial, or nail in the coffin if you will, of the nebulous non-reality cotton-candy fiction video game film, epitomized by the likes of the fringe-dwelling Super Mario Bros. and radioactive Street Fighter as well as spiritual comrade The Wiz.  Unfortunately, Mortal Kombat is not as incandescently disturbed, with not nearly as much bad acid-trip imagery spray-painted all about, as those films, but it’s an admirably hemorrhaging fount of pseudo-camp that is tacitly indebted to the chop-socky mysticism and bald-faced triviality of the insubstantial kung-fu lunacy that the Mortal Kombat video game was spiritually smitten with to begin with. Continue reading

Progenitors: Alice

tumblr_n43gg3frlm1r61i6yo2_1280Another year, another ho-hum Lewis Carroll adaptation. Cutting to the chase, here’s a review of the best one. 

With so many adaptations of Lewis Carroll’s nonsense classic Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland neglecting the lurid insanity and unshackled insubordination of the positively criminal original and shoe-horning an incongruous, structured-encased fairy tale narrative onto a fundamentally structureless work, Jan Švankmajer’s 1988 Alice is a refreshingly fractured trance of indelible potency. With logic never driving the way – barely even riding shotgun most of the time – Švankmajer’s Alice is perhaps the only feature film adaptation of Carroll’s writing to weaponize the visual frame as a realm of gloriously disreputable possibility for expression, rather than as an excuse to rein in the bleeding entropy of Carroll’s original text. Structural integrity, by and large, is the albatross of any Alice film, and Švankmajer’s vision, teetering on stilts and just barely jumping over self-imposed chainsaws slashing at their bases, is downright volatile. Continue reading

Review: X-Men: Apocalypse

8597c6f8d30a096991f53d0e8081feadc1f43dedWould that the rambunctious punk attitude halfheartedly flaunted by X-Men: Apocalypse in a few of its extremities (hair, costumes) had descended into its major organs as well. A structural makeover, with a rebellious narrative more fascinatingly fractured than the milquetoast clash-of-kings promised here, could have made Apocalypse more than the competent, if bog-standard, throat-clearing exercise it ultimately is. On some level, the film retreats from the structural excess of previous film X-Men: Days of Future Past , where an overlapping, byzantine time labyrinth sometimes got the best of the humans trapped in its machinations. The longer but ultimately leaner (read: simpler) Apocalypse is a little more punk and less Rush this time out, despite the de rigueur world-ending climax that’s more or less accepted by this point in superhero cinema history. But it never attains the snotty, vituperative snarl of the Sex Pistols, the discombobulated comic brio of the Ramones, or the stylistic omnivorous brashness of the Clash; instead, it expends quite a lot of energy wallowing around in a state of blissful neutrality, not accomplishing much but doing an acceptable workaday job arriving at its mostly trivial end-goal. Continue reading

Film Favorites: A Brighter Summer Day

brighter-a-500Edited for Clarity

Edward Yang, who passed away nearly a decade ago after only releasing a handful of films, remains one of the great missed opportunities of the cinematic world. The marathon-cinema of Yang, lugubrious yet furiously enlivened with the sheer kinetic lifeblood of color and mise-en-scene, flutters of visual incandescence and roiling textual energy, is among the most challenging philosophical canons of the modern era, as well as among the most rewarding and intoxicatingly cinematic. Curated but spasmodic, fleet but hearty, the deceptive perfection of Yang’s deliberate style only belies how nerve-frying his passion is; much like a modern-day Tarkovsky, he directs like the weight of existence is upon him, as if making a film is the only way he can inscribe meaning to the chaos of the world by transfiguring it into a medley of pure, experiential cinematic shape, geometry, and movement. It’s cinema as resilience against the fading of the light, and maybe, just maybe, cinema as a new light altogether. Continue reading

Hey, I’m Into Music Too You Guys!: Music Reviews from 2015-Present

tThis alphabetical list will be regularly updated whenever I listen to a new album.

Baroness, Purple: A-

A near-fatal bus attack and the loss of half your band isn’t an easy thing to overcome, but John Baizley’s merry band of troubadours trucks on with Purple, an album that coils their serpentine Southern sludge sound even as it proves this band, as if encased in a caterwauling moan as thick as  Savannah molasses, can survive anything. Loss lingers in the frayed ends of Baizley’s guitar sound, but Purple is an oddly unkempt, upbeat album from a genre that is notoriously caked in doom-and-gloom. Desperation burns and slithers throughout the album, but Baroness is the sound of a band acknowledging their specters without being defined by them, turning up the amps on life after a tentative meeting with the reaper.

Beastwars, The Death of All Things: A

Stitching bent odds and ends together to amalgamate tortured riffs and cackling solos from beyond, this is metal music in the Sabbath tradition: an unhurried, earth-burrowing, glacial holocaust that understands that the race to the top of the metal world doesn’t have to play out like a thousand-miles-per-hour speedway. The ever-nebulous “heavy” isn’t measured in the righteousness of your licks or the number of fire extinguishers necessary to douse the output of your shredding, but in the bruising, pummeling shake you feel in the darkest caverns of your gut whilst threatening the metal gods by standing atop them at ground level. Real metal doesn’t always reach for the sky; it locates more subterranean ghouls and draws them out of the crust of the Earth like a necromancer. So outside the norm they can’t just be from down under, but from down under’s underbelly of New Zealand, the mostly unknown Beastwars grab Peter Jackson’s lustrous, gawking vision of that region of the world and curdle it down to its primordial bones. An ice-cold killer of an album.

Beyonce, Lemonade: A –

A phenomenal work of insinuation over elaboration, Beyonce’s surreptitiously-released Lemonade is an animalistic bludgeon of sweat-soaked vocal pangs simultaneously lacerating and celebrating infidelity to a soundtrack of shirtless, throbbing sexual urges intonated as thoroughly as an instrument could possibly muster. An album of pants rather than lyrics, Lemonade casually but demonstratively vanquishes thoughts that Beyonce is irrelevant in the modern world, or that her inveterate charisma can’t be channeled into something this coarse and deliciously impolite. With shimmering pop melodies trampled underfoot the sheer vitriol of Beyonce’ s pelvis-stomping vocal performance and, more importantly, the cataclysm of slithering Trap-influence insidiousness she kicks up musically, it’s a veritable anarchist’s cookbook, a study guide in how to build a musical bomb. Continue reading